In just more than a weeks time I will be getting my GCSE results and saying my final goodbye to my beloved Secondary School. In September I will be starting at Sixth Form and will probably lose touch with half the people I hold dear to me now. I can feel the change happening but I don’t want change.
I have changed so much since starting my Secndary school but this is just too much change for me to bare. I feel like i will be transported back to 4 year old me on my first day of school wondering if I will make friends, if I will like it and if i belong. I don’t think i am ready for that.
Change is good. Change happens all the time. Whether this is changing the colour of your nails or completely changing your wardrobe because it doesn’t fit your vibe any more. Even changing your perfume can have a different effect on your life. I like change. It keeps life exciting. Then why do I have doubts in my mind?
I feel as though something big is going to happen. I feel as though this period in my life is the silence before the storm. The cracks are beginning to show in my friend group and i am scared that I will end up hating or not speaking to some of these people again in my life. I don’t want the drama. I don’t want to lose my friends.
Maybe it will be for the best. Maybe it won’t. I just feel like something big is going to happen and not knowing what it is, is killing me. Sometimes I wish I could just see into the future, so I know the dangers a head. Unfortunately I can’t because life is about going into uncertain places and finding out how to deal with them.
Like secondary school, sixth form will be a new adventure. A new chapter of my life. I just hope it’s going to be a good one.